Letters of the week

Madame Tussuad's left their Nicole dummy behind.

Anna..... .
Even you must concede that for a lady of nigh on 42 Nikki looks FANTASTIC. I think it is time that Nicole was appreciated for her exhibition of extreme feminine beauty at a relatively advanced age. The churlish and misguided condemnations of her alleged Botox use miss the point . Nicole IS beautiful therefore the ends justify the means.

Remember that Nicole has some very demanding and hormonally overactive fans to satisfy - don't deny some rather aesthetically unbecoming onanists the opportunity of spanking their monkeys to her very sublime silky smooth skin. Otherwise : there's always Kylie I suppose.

peterski. Still Nic's number 1 fan.

Oh peterski, I do delight in your delusional adoration of Kidman. By all means return to your little monkey, you must tell us his name!

Hope all is fine with you and yours.

What is the deal with NK?

There hasn't been any wife worship from her beloved, there hasn't been any photo ops, or any inarticulate statements for quite a while.

I'm almost tempted to quit looking for them.

But then I remember, it has to end soon.

How long does she usually go until she thinks it's safe to re-emerge?

H.L

Everything is fine with me and mine H.L thanks for asking. (Actually I have kind of a crush on someone at the moment sssshhh so that's been fun. ....NO! ....not you peterski.....please put your monkey away!)

I think my previous post probably answers all your questions, Kidman is keeping things to herself right now, it wont be long though before she emerges from her cocoon.




Hello there,

After looking at a recent picture of Nicole Kidman I have to say (as a fan it pains me to say it) she really has gone too far with the cosmetic procedures! I'm not going to deny it anymore. You nailed it on the head when you said that it looks like her face hurts!! Why does she do this??? She's absolutely beautiful, I would KILL for her bone structure!! Surgery actually makes her look older- I dont think that was part of her plan.
I am a big fan of hers, always have been, always will be! But I wish she was secure enough within herself to just age gracefully!

NK Fan

I agree with you and with peterski. Nicole Kidman is very beautiful. Which is why it's so frustrating that she insists on continuing to do whatever the hell it is that she does to her face. There is nothing wrong in a women wanting to look attractive and to attempt to keep the ravages of age at bay (my Elizabeth Arden bills attest to that) but when your procedures have you looking more like a Barbie doll than a real woman you need to stop. Your 40's should be some of the best years of your life, it shouldn't be a panic filled wasteland where fears of no longer being a girl force you to look like a plastic mannequin. Sadly I guess Kidman isn't listening and what will ultimately suffer the most from this botox/filler obsession will be her career. When she is 64 and looks more like Joan Rivers than Helen Mirren nobody will hire her.

More work for Cate Blanchett I guess.

Juxtaposition

Aaah, bump watch don't ya love it?

5 months ago I was told by a very reliable source that Nicole Kidman was trying to fall pregnant.

A little over 2 months ago I was told Kidman was indeed with child, and then a very strange thing happened. My source went cold, perhaps silenced is probably a better word. In fact they even tried to back track on me. Always mindful of protecting those kind enough to throw me the occasional inside Kidman tidbit I decided not to push it. Since then however the press rumors have begun to rapidly swell, and as usual Kidman is denying she is pregnant (deja vu anyone?)

For what it's worth to anyone who reads my blog, I personally believe that Nicole Kidman is indeed pregnant again.

As for why Kidman demanded that her friends remain quiet on this pregnancy, I can't really say. Something to do with handling the media on this pregnancy a little better, perhaps? If you really want that sort of control Nic, I suggest exercising out of sight of photographers this time.

Letter of the week

You say you don't hate Nicole Kidman, and you claim to not be a fan of Nicole or for that matter a fan of Keith Urban jealous of his marriage to Nicole, so why do you write this blog? It just seems you put a tremendous amount of time and energy into a blog about someone you don't like, what's in it for you? You have some great photos of Kidman and I'm a fan so that's why I visit and also you seem to report a lot of news about her early on like the Schweppes commercial which by the way I like, so why do you do this blog?

R.P

You are correct. I'm not a hater nor a fan of Kidman. What fascinates me is not celebrities but the cult of celebrity. As a fan I'm sure you know a lot about Nicole Kidman, many people are fascinated by her or by other movie stars. What interests me is why people are fascinated by celebrities, when as far as I'm concerned, there are far more fascinating people on this earth such as Martti Ahtisaari or Françoise Barré-Sinouss (please Google if you have no idea who these people are) who are at this moment changing your life far more profoundly than Nicole Kidman ever will. NKF is trying with humor (I know, debatable at times) to ask questions about society, women's issues with self esteem and their bodies and media manipulation of the public all in one little package. It's a big ask and I don't always get it right, but hopefully over time it might all become a little clearer.

I'm from Scotland and the news here at the moment is that Lorraine Kelly, a popular tv host says she used to like Nicole Kidman, but has gone off her because her face doesn't move. Lorraine says wrinkles are sexy. Do you think wrinkles are sexy? Do you think that all plastic surgery is bad?

I.O

Och! (little Scottish joke)I don't think wrinkles are sexy or unsexy. I think if people are attractive it has almost nothing to do with their face and everything to do with their soul, intelligence and intention. It's a popular belief that men get better looking with age, so I guess wrinkles are attached to that thought but really if you are a beautiful, healthy and loving person on the inside it shows on the out. As for my thoughts on plastic surgery; I believe that if a procedure will make you feel so much happier about yourself you should do it. People's lives can be transformed by a great nose job or a chin implant mostly because they finally feel confident enough about themselves to go out and have the life they deserve. However, it's obvious that many stars, not just Kidman have become addicted to procedures and taken it too far. I guess like anything else moderation and perhaps a good dose of realistic expectation is the key. See Dr Youn's blog for advice by a surgeon who has a realistic and sensible attitude towards cosmetic surgery.

More fun at Kidman's expense.

More fun from the inbox at NKF!

'When I first saw the Nicole Kidman Schweppes ad I thought they might have used computer technology to smooth the wrinkles from her face, or used those soft focus lens on the camera but after seeing the photos of Kidman at the march for babies, I realise her face is that freakish in real life. Imagine talking to her in person? I wouln't be able to concentrate on what she was saying, too busy looking at her struggling for expression on that mask of a face'.

T.P

'I am never drinking Schweppes again, after seeing the way Nickers wraps her mouth around the neck of that bottle! Canada Dry baby all the way!'

C

'Kidman doesn't kiss in the ad because people don't kiss on screen in India, idiot! Indian films blend fantasy with reality so this ad would seem very normal in India.'

ML

Yes, but would Kidman's face seem very normal.... anywhere?

Someone else thinks Kidman's commercial sux!

It's not rare for A-list stars to sign up for obscure advertising campaigns abroad, earning millions of dollars for appearing in commercials they hope will be never seen in Hollywood.

But when Nicole Kidman signed up to star in the new French ads for Schweppes mixers, she could have hardly expected her appearance to go unnoticed.

The Oscar winner, who was famously paid £2million for a Chanel No.5 ad, stars alongside Slumdog Millionaire child actress Rubina Ali in the new Schweppes ad, which follows a confusing plotline.

The advert, which has been subtitled in French, was filmed over three days at the stunning Lake Palace in Udaipur, India, in March.

The lavish piece was directed by Elizabeth film-maker Shekhar Kapur and produced by Ridley Scott.

Rubina's father Rafiq Ali said his young daughter, who lives in the Mumbai slums in real-life, made more money from her few days on the Schweppes set than she did in the whole of Oscar-winning Slumdog Millionaire.

He said: 'We are very proud of her and hope she continues to become a big star. Maybe then we will be able to live in a proper house. (or when I sell her what ever comes first ;))

The money she’s receiving for doing this ad is more than the total she got for Slumdog.'

The commercial stars Nicole as a travelling princess who has arrived at the palace for a rendezvous with her handsome lover, played by Bollywood star Arjun Rampal.Clearly popular with the female residents of the palace, Nicole finds herself centre of attention as a band of adoring women in saris dance around her.

But there's one female Nicole just can't keep her eyes off - adorable nine-year-old Rubina, who is also dressed in traditional Indian clothes. Obviously sharing a special connection the rest of the group aren't in on, Nicole and Rubina flees the 'party' hand-in-hand to check out the view across the stunning lake setting.Against the backdrop of the lake, the two share a private joke as they giggle on the intricate pier covered in lighted gazebos. Tall Nicole bends down to Rubina's level and, in one of the most bizarre segments of the ad, touch each others faces.

Nicole appears to then abandon Rubina to seemingly 'float' across the lake, where a shadowy figure is waiting for her.An excited Nicole removes her lace headdress and unzips her dress in preparation for her romantic tryst.The couple finally come face-to-face and Nicole rushes up to her leading man and appear to lean in to him for a passionate kiss.

But in keeping with Bollywood tradition, which never sees members of the opposite sex kiss, Nicole stops short of their lips meeting and slinks off to her bedroom at the palace.After slamming the door behind her, leaving a disappointed Arjun outside, Nicole grabs a bottle of Schweppes Agrum (a grapefruit, tangerine and orange flavoured mixer).

In contrast to her feminine appearance in the ad, Nicole swigs the drink in an unladylike way. After refreshing herself, she turns to the camera giggling and says, 'What did you expect?'

The Australian actress then bursts into giggles and the audience realises her new friend Rubina is also in the room for her.

Please click on the link to view all the hysterical comments that accompany the photos.

The Daily Mail

Kidman's commercial; Your thoughts.

The above photo has nothing to do with the post, I just think it's fab, don't you?

Lot's of great letter's coming in about Kidman's Schweppes ad, please keep them coming I'm having so much fun reading them. Here are a couple to start off with;

The weirdest thing ever - and poor little Rubina - I'm glad she's getting work but her appearance has no context what so ever. Well - the whole commercial has no context, SOOO RANDOM Seriously - I HATE when NK does that breathy Marilyn voice FAIL
D.T


Just wanted to say thanks for putting the ad on the net. Its a bit hysterical and to be honest i don't get it. (LOL). Sorta had nothing to do with a soft'drink but i must admit i was too busy looking at kidmans too perfect skin to recall much of the ad. haha
B


This song was sent to me yesterday by somebody calling themselves
The Ghost of George Harrison, I have to tell you I found it very entertaining. Hope you do too.

Hare Krishna!



Vale to Nicole's Face

Pluck G string on Sitar

Main Vocal (Indian backup singers/telemarketers poor english)

I once loved Nicole Kidman. (yes it's true, yes it's true)
Where did her face go? (boo hoo boo hoo)
She was once so very pretty (yes she was, yes she was)
Now she's unrecognisable (like Ken Wahl, like Ken Wahl (?????))

I want her back ( yes I do, yes I do)
And though you really hate her ( it's true, uh huh, it's true)
I know you want it to ( You do, you know you do)
I wonder where she left it? (In the loo? In the loo?)

Sampled Nicole's voice saying looped "So what did you expect"

Here we are in India (Rocking Bankhora solo)
Drinking ginger by the bottle (?????????)
But all we really want... (What? What? What?)
Is "Our Nicole's" face back (Rot! Rot! Rot!)

tambourines to fade

Kidman Co-Star of the week

Ben Chaplin. I find this actor fascinating for reasons of my own, however for now let's just make him the focus of our co-star of the week, shall we?

Ben Chaplin, born and raised in England, dropped out of drama school and has had a darn interesting career since. Maybe you remember him from the atrocious The truth about cats and dogs? As seems to be Ben's way, right on the cusp of what could have been a career filled with Hollywood leading man roles, he turned his back on the whole thing and returned to the stage. He's been nominated for both an Olivier and a Tony award and has in the main, chosen quirky off-beat films and television to showcase his unassuming talent. Ben was Kidman's co-star in Birthday Girl which also starred one of my all time favorite actors Vincent Cassel.

I think Ben Chaplin is one of those men who will actually be far more handsome at 50 than he ever was at 25. Don't you hate that?

Nicole Kidman's Schweppes commercial in high definition

Nicole Kidman schweppes ad

This is a much better video of the commercial, enjoy!

Nicole Kidman's schweppes commercial!

Holy cow. Seriously guys this commercial is hysterical, wet your pants funny. I'm not joking. Kidman looks so bizarre in this ad as if she was made entirely of plastic, she's almost unrecognisable as human. Check it out here. It's the bottom video.

P.S Many thanks to K who did indeed brighten my day with this. I had heard it was out there in the WWW but couldn't find it and then there it was waiting in my inbox this morning like Christmas!

See good things do happen, even to evil bloggers such as myself.

P.P.S Please write to me at nkforehead@gmail.com and let me know what you think of Nicole Kidman's new commercial. Your thoughts, reviews, jokes, poems even video responses whatever and I will post them on the site. It should be a really great (and hopefully hysterical) interactive experience. Thanks.

Letter of the week

Dear Bitch-Face,

Why are you so determined to destroy Nicole Kidman's good name? Nothing you write on your blog is funny, insightful or illuminating! You're just some smug writer who thinks she knows everything! I know you hate it when people call you jealous, but you must be! Why else would you keep writing this dumb blog? You're an example of the horrid tall poppy syndrome that all Australian's suffer from! Leave Nicole alone!!!!

C.J

Dear Flagrant-abuser-of-the-exclamation-mark,

We both know I've done nothing to destroy Nicole Kidman, her name or anything else that she's currently using. Perhaps I've given a few people some food for thought, including Ms. Kidman herself. Hopefully I've given some people some laughs...sadly it seems I've only given you an aneurysm. As for TPS, it's a proud Aussie institution, designed to stop all Aussie's getting too full of themselves, I think it's worked beautifully so far, don't you?


Dear Anna

I like your blog. I heard a rumour that Nicole Kidman is bidding for the rights to a movie about an asylum. Is that right?

Scooter

Dear gossip hound,

I think perhaps the movie you are referring to is Chris Cleave's The Other Hand. In the U.S and Canada it's being published as Little Bee. The novel is about a 14 year old Nigerian asylum seeker. There is no script at present, just rights to the story being shopped around amongst the studios. It remains to be seen if Kidman's company Blossom Films is serious about the project but they have been mentioned as interested. I haven't as yet read the story myself but if you want to know more about it go here.

Why YOU need a media mogul in your pocket!

198.

That's the number of internet news articles generated in the last 48 hours from Kidman's old Glamour interview that ICP regurgitated in Marie Claire this month. 198.

198 re-blips about Tom's control issues, how she cowered in the background at events and how she hopes Katie has another baby for the kids Nicole never sees.

Whatever.

You think I'm one of those crazy conspiracy theory nuts, don't you? That this has nothing to do with Kidman, her publicity team or her friendship with Rupert Murdoch? Uh huh. Tell me then, can you name one other actress who doesn't have a film out this week, hasn't gotten divorced, announced she was gay, is filming the Twilight films or at the very least done something more exciting this week than going to the gym who has 198 google news blips out there tonight?

For your information Angelina Jolie has 46 and Jennifer Aniston has 43.

198 news stories for an article that she did 6 months ago. Ms Kidman I take my hat off to you.

Cowering in the background?

When? When have you ever cowered in the background Nicole?

Why is Marie Claire dredging this old interview up now? IPC regurgitates stories like a bulimic school girl does Tim Tams.
Sorry, I don't buy it. Still interesting choice of word isn't it?

Cower: 'to shrink away or crouch especially for shelter from something that menaces, domineers, or dismays'.

By the way

Like the new title picture? I do. It captures something about Kidman's recent face I've never quite been able to describe before. Nicole Kidman's face looks like it hurts. All the time. Hurts to talk, hurts to smile, hurts just sitting there hanging off her skull.

It actually hurts me just looking at it.

Kidman Co-Star of the week

Clarkson is 50 years old this December and I must say she looks incredible. I have no doubt she's had a little cosmetic help on the way, (let's not be naive) but it's so subtle, so realistic. This is not a women trying to stay young, it is a woman ageing well. (Note to Nic...this is how it's done, not whatever you've been doing)

What can one possibly say about an actress of Patricia Clarkson's stature? No amount of glowing tributes can really pay respect to her calibre or the talent of this award winning actress. Another Kidman co-star with over 60 film and television credits to her name, Patricia is currently starring in Woody Allen's latest film Whatever Works.

Her outstanding performance in Lars von Trier's Dogville was brilliant and as far as this blogger is concerned the lynchpin of the entire film. If you haven't seen Dogville you should. I wouldn't say it's von Trier's greatest work, but I would say it's an accessible step into his slow laborious style. (Spoiler: For what it's worth I think they all deserved to die, especially Paul Bettany.)

As for Clarkson, she will continue to grow from strength to strength as an actress, proving that age is no barrier to great performances.